Reconnecting

Reconnecting through the hurdles of distance andrelationships, once formed, is logistically arduous. But
time is never easy. It involves travel. Interruptions toonce committed to the idea, making the effort to
busy schedules, alterations in the normal routines ofreconnect becomes an inspired process. Ensuring that
family life and unforeseeable frustrations as things,the logistical details will take you safely there become
along the way, go awry.worth every ounce of the struggle.
Such was the case this weekend when my husbandChildren grow and reconnections to their life-shaping
and I made a quick trip to Miami for a fundraising galaforces and faces must be re-kindled. How's your
supporting one of our favorite organizations. Thedaughter doing? Where is she applying to college?
invitation had been on our calendars for weeks, butWhen's the new baby due? What's going on in your
as the date approached, we wondered how in thebusiness? How's your mom? Did you get through
heck we were going to be able to logisticallythat awful physical therapy? Have you recovered
re-shuffle an already-bewildering matrix of work;from your surgery? We share common struggles,
football games; an out-of-state orchestra retreat forquestions and dilemmas. Three sets of parents
one of our kids; and dog care, lawn care and childwaiting for cars outside the valet area all shared in
care. Add to the equation delayed flights both therethe common experience of raising fourteen-year-old
and back (weather problems on the way anddaughters. Two other moms and I commiserated
mechanical trouble on the way back), and one standsabout the college application process. Complaining
amazed that anyone can pull off reconnecting at all.about the real estate market and where we might
But oh my, few things beat reconnecting with oldsettle in retirement were other common topics of
friends! My drive from the airport to the hotel wasconversation.
made easier by a phone call to an old Miami friend;Keeping relationships alive provides nourishment for
breakfast was a celebration with my cousin and herour souls. Refreshment for our spirits. Continuation of
husband; and the gala itself was one huge reunionideals. Succession of friendships.
with friends we hadn't seen since our move threeI've been blessed these past few weeks by more
years ago back to New England. The completethan my share of wonderful reconnections: with my
change in countenance on our fearless leader's facesister and her family in North Carolina for a quick
when he saw my husband and I enter the ballroomlunch en route to vacation; with my oldest friend and
made the entire travel ritual worth it. Arms extendedher family in Pennsylvania while working on my book;
wide, warm kisses to both cheeks and longnext weekend will take me to D.C. to a conference
reconnecting conversation was all I really needed. Iwhere I'll reconnect with friends made over the past
could have left at that point, without even eating thedecade of almost-yearly attendance.
scrumptious awaiting spread; his embrace alone did itEspecially as we struggle to just get through the daily
for me.responsibilities of motherhood, with toddler's needs
Many of us do not enjoy the indulgence of onematched by those of busy spouses, with home and
home base, surrounded by family and friends ofwork demands matched by those of community
decades-long journeys shared. We bounce aroundservice, it's important to factor in reconnecting--at an
counties and countries, in and out of homes andintimate level or on one less complicated--to ensure
neighborhoods and friendships at dizzying paces. Gonethat the cycles of life will be shared with those
are the days of one employer, one school district andwhom we love. That rituals will continue for our
one set of girlfriends. We settle down one year onlylifetimes and perhaps even for those of our children.
to uproot the next, ushering kids and spouses intoThat connecting--and reconnecting--will carry us on
strange communities with perplexing newinto the unspoken joys that bring beauty and
realities--and strange people--to match. Keeping upmeaning into everyday life.