Parenting Management

"Most children are raised by amateurs, notmost definitely does not
professionals."mean the graduate is socially well-adjusted, but that
- Bryce's LawINTRODUCTIONWant to know whathe/she has learned to study
to expect of the work force in the years ahead?and accept new ideas. If anything, the student's
Look no fartherextracurricular activities tell
than our schools or homes. Let me preface mymore about a person's personality than the degree
remarks by saying that in additionitself. For example, participation
to all of my other responsibilities, I was very activein team sports, club activities, or Greek life speaks
in my local Little League for avolumes about a person's
number of years where I served as coach, umpire,personality and social skills.PAST EFFORTSIn the
and on the local board ofpast, new corporate recruits underwent special
directors. Further, I have been very active locally intraining programs to learn how
offering Masonic scholarships tothe company conducts business. Sales people in
High School students. In addition, my wife has beenparticular had to undergo rigorous
active in the local school systemtraining to learn how to present products and care
for the last ten years at the elementary, middle, andfor the customers. Workmen
high school levels (this alsounderwent training to learn how to build quality
included PTA and SAC). Although we probably won'tproducts. However, such programs
win an award as the world'shave been slashed in recent times as a means for
best parents, we made a point of becoming ancutting costs (and will be the subject
important and influential part of ourof a future paper).There was also a period where
children's lives. We didn't take any special courses inmentors were assigned to new employees to
parenting, we just gotchaperone
involved. But we are the exceptions as opposed tothem on their journey through the corporate world.
the rule.Prior to World War II, the country wasMentors were basically a
immersed in an economic depression which"Big Brother/Sister" program where senior
put a strain on families and disrupted our society.employees would offer sage advice
Everyone in a family was expectedto neophytes on adapting to the corporate world.
to pitch in and do their part in order to survive, thisBut like the training programs,
included going to school and theirmentoring is also being phased out.Although
place of worship. Some families suffered severementoring and training programs were intended to
hardships during this period causingdevelop the employee's
children to drop out of school and go to work. Theyskills and effectiveness from a corporate
didn't drop out as some formperspective, neither dwelled on the personal
of rebellion or protest, but to simply earn money toproblems of the employee.Now that new employees
help support the family. Consequently,are left to fend for themselves, a generation gap is
many earned nothing higher than a Junior Highemerging
diploma which was prized by manyin business. Managers from just about every job
families. The point is, there was a sense of familysegment are frustrated with new
back then and the people's hungeremployees, and, likewise, new employees are
built character. They understood the value of afrustrated with management. Whereas
dollar, worked hard and squanderedmanagers lament how little is accomplished by new
nothing. It was this generation that got us throughemployees, new employees
the war and propelled the countrycomplain how much time they are putting in at work.
towards economic success in the latter part of theThis highlights a significant
20th century.In the 1950's and 1960's, as the countrydifference between the generations: whereas the
was experiencing an economic boom, a parentnew employees are watching the
normally stayed at home to manage the family,clock, the managers are watching what is produced.
usually the wife. If a childThe two are not synonymous,
had a problem, a parent was always home to tendbut nobody has taught the young employees this
to their needs. Children no longeryet. To the "newbies," their time is
had to drop out of school to support the family andwhat is important, regardless if they produce
our High Schools and Collegesanything worthwhile or not; to the manager,
swelled with students. The "baby boomers" wereit is just the opposite. Also, young people believe
considered well adjustedcalling in sick is an acceptable form of
and readily adapted to the work force. Thisbehavior. Where did they learn all this? On their own.
generation saw us through the spaceIt is a sad state of affairs when
race and the technology revolution which changedthe media has more influence over the values of our
the face of corporate America.But in the last threechildren than parents do. But
decades, we began to lose faith in our economy andwhen adults abdicate parenting to the media, it is
ournot entirely surprising.So, what is needed? More
standard of living. As a result, both parents began totraining? Mentoring? Nope. Just some parenting. The
work inordinate hours and asooner
generation gap began to emerge. Exhausted by theircorporations realize this, the sooner they can begin
work, the parentsto develop mature and responsible
would return home where the last thing theyemployees. Again, this is why the military now
wanted to hear was their child'steaches its Drill Instructors basic
problems. Consequently, children became socialcounseling techniques, so they can help new recruits
outcasts in their own homes andfind their way through life and become
often had to fend for themselves; they simplya good soldier. It is most definitely not "baby-sitting"
couldn't relate with their parents. Sure,but, rather, a recognition that parents
the parents would sign their kids up for Summerhave dropped the ball in their child's development
Camp, Little League and Soccer, butand someone has to pick up the
this was viewed more as baby-sitting services aspieces in order for the newbie to realize their
opposed to taking a true interest inpotential.I do not claim to have a Ph.D. in parenting,
the child's development. They would also give theirbut as I see it there are three primary
kids television sets and video gamesduties a parent needs to inculcate:* Role Model -
to occupy their time.Today, school teachers havefirst, a parent has to be a good role model with
become surrogate parents by default, somethingattributes their subordinateswant to aspire to attain.
they weren't trained for, nor inclined to accept. TalkRole models are respected for their authority and
to a teacher and you will hearbecomea highly credible source of information and
stories of lack of respect for authority, poorinspiration,* Teacher - second, a parent has to be
manners, and dysfunctional socialable to teach, not just academic lessons butthose of
intercourse. Children today no longer learn theirlife; e.g., morality, socialization, even finances (e.g.,
values from their parentsbalancing acheckbook, life insurance, etc.). It is the
but rather from Hollywood. As young adults enteringteacher who establishes the rules andregulations of
the work force, their workthe classroom and, as such, is also the disciplinarian.*
ethic, values, and behavior are noticeably differentGuidance Counselor - third, parenting includes guiding
than the prior generation. Thereothers on their path throughlife, explaining options and
is no longer a sense of quality, service, ormaking recommendations.Very important, a parent
craftsmanship; just put in your time andhas to recognize they won't have all of the answers,
collect a paycheck. This is all having an adversebut
effect on how we conductshould know how to point someone in the right
business and the corporate culture.Now, let me givedirection to get the answers they need.Above all
you a the scary figure: probably 20%, or less, ofelse, a parent has to care about the welfare of their
today'soffspring. I am not
graduating High School seniors are socially wellsuggesting corporate parents love their children like
adjusted.Knowing this, what should you do as abiological parents, but they
manager?THE NEED FOR PARENTINGIn the past, ifneed to invest time in the person, believe in the
you were a new employee, it was assumed youperson, and motivate them
knew how to manageaccordingly, whether through kindness or a good
your personal life and you were expected to adaptswift kick in the rear. The
to the corporate culture. Thiscorporate parent has to also know when their work
is no longer true and presents a problem foris complete and allow the
managers. Younger employees todayoffspring to move on to the next stage of their
have problems managing money, dressingcorporate life.The military has the advantage of
appropriately, and interpersonal relationswritten contracts and boot camps to
and communications, not to mention alcohol, drugs,indoctrinate new recruits. Perhaps a corporate boot
and sex. They are raw and rough. Butcamp could be devised
are they salvageable? They better be, for yourand teach the same lessons as found in the military,
company's sake, as they representsuch as:* Cause and effect, e.g., if you make a
tomorrow's work force.Perhaps we can take amistake, you know you will be penalized accordingly.*
lesson from the military services here. The military isThe value of good workmanship and its impact on
well aware they are not getting the "cream of theothers.* How to give and take an order.* Discipline
crop" when they take on newand code of conduct.*
recruits. Many are social misfits coming from brokenTeamwork.CONCLUSIONCompanies today are at a
homes. As such, theloss coping with the newest generation of
military's initial role is to break the individual of badworkers. What they don't realize is, it will get worse
habits and impose a newbefore it gets better. Since
system of discipline and work ethic. Individualism ismost biological parents are content with allowing
replaced by teamwork and,others to teach their children
in the process, a sense of belonging and family isthe necessary values in life, teachers, the military
imposed. This is either readilyand corporations are forced to
accepted by the new recruit or they are drummedpick up the slack, like it or not. The sooner we admit
out of the service. Discipline,this, the sooner we can address
organization, teamwork, and a strong work ethic canhow to remedy the situation. Whether this involves
have a dramatic affect on aone-on-one counseling or a
drifting soul. By doing so, it can bring order to livesboot camp type of environment, something has to
and a sense of purpose,be done to teach our newest wave
something that perhaps was neglected atof workers the proper values to succeed in business
home.Today's Drill Instructors and junior officers alsoand in life.Let me leave you with a real-life story on
find themselves as surrogate parentsparenting in the workplace. Some time
and are now instructed in counseling young soldiers.ago I was visiting with a CIO in Columbus, Ohio who
The boot camps of today aretook me on a tour of
a lot different than what the country experiencedhis facility. Along the way, we happened upon a
during World War II, Korea, andyoung programmer who
Viet Nam. Yet, we are producing a fine class ofwas new to the company. Frankly, he looked a little
soldiers which makes our countrywet behind the ears and
proud. In other words, they must be doinghad long hair over his collar. After the CIO
something right.If we have learned anything from theintroduced me to the young man, he
military in this regard, it is that theinstructed him to go get a haircut. The young
times have changed and our employees today haveprogrammer, shot back
different needs requiringindignantly, "You can't say that to me!"The CIO
a new type of manager who can adequately tendturned calmly but deliberately to the programmer,
to them. And like today'sand said,
Drill Instructors and school teachers, managers are"Yes I can. Watch," then pointing to his mouth, "Get
finding themselves in thea haircut. Now!"The programmer backed down and,
role of surrogate parents, like it or not. Managersto his credit, dutifully got a haircut.I had just
bristle at this notion. After all,witnessed a little "Parenting Management" in action.
they want to get on with their business and do notThe CIO
want to be regarded as aexercised his authority and had quickly instructed the
baby-sitter. But the fact remains, home parentingnewbie on one
skills are at an all-time lowof the rules to be observed in the workplace. The
and to overcome this problem, someone has toprogrammer's biological
assume the duty to compensateparents hadn't instructed him properly, now it
for this inadequacy. Again, the military readilydefaulted to his corporate
understands this and has adaptedparent."Parenting Management" - Just remember,
accordingly. But can business?Understand this,you heard it here first.Tim Bryce is the Managing
corporate America's "recruits" come predominantlyDirector of M. Bryce & Associates (MBA) of
from thePalm Harbor, Florida and has 30 years of experience
colleges and universities whose purpose is not toin the field. He
teach social skills, but rather,is available for training and consulting on an
to teach people how to learn. A college diplomainternational basis.